If you get involved, you end up being a Buffer, an emotional airbag that lessens the impact of their transition caused by the end of their previous relationship.
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What you can be sure of is that their mind is not anywhere near as focused on the relationship job at hand because they’re distracted by the emotional and/or legal ties. Look, I get it, it’s hard after a breakup or a loss through death because you’re consumed with thoughts about them and recognise that you need to get back out there. People who don’t manage their own ‘impacts’ from relationship are far more comfortable finding a Buffer (yes that would be you) to lessen the impact of the previous relationship during this transition.
That said, they’re with you for the wrong purpose – distracting them from or even helping them completely avoid their feelings or any fallout from the previous relationship. You help numb the pain but what you don’t realise is that it’s not gone. At least not the conscious sort that will allow them to contemplate their actions and connect the dots of their behaviour with what results. Commitment avoidance via maintaining emotional and/or legal ties elsewhere.
Volunteers who had previously gone through a painful break-up were shown pictures of their exes, and asked to think of a positive memory, then of a painful one.
They also had an object placed on their arm, which at one time produced a warm, pleasurable sensation, and another was heated up to cause pain.
He’s keen to progress things but I’ve kept him at arms-length (with honesty and openness about why).
The new guy is so very different to anyone I’ve ever dated before, and I know this is a good thing, on so many levels.
Here are 15 rebound relationship signs that can help you understand the emotions you’re going through.
If you find that you’re experiencing more than a few of these signs, there’s a good chance you’re in love only to get over an older love! If you’ve been dumped by your ex or have experienced a bad relationship, you helplessly get drawn to anyone who gives you attention.
Short answer: Yes, if you’re actually a good match.